Thought-Provoking Quotes

On a road trip to Boston, I glanced at my Starbucks cup and found the following:

My cousin in Tibet is an illiterate subsistence farmer. By accident of birth, I was raised in the West and have a Ph.D. The task of our generation is to cut through the illusion that we inhabit separate worlds. Only then will we find the heart to rise to the daunting but urgent challenges of global disparity.
Losang Rabgey, Ph.D.
National Georgraphic Emergin Explorer and co-founder of Machik, a nonprofit helping communities on the Tibetan plateau.

It is part of series, The Way I See It, that is printed on Starbucks cards. The quotes are not necessarily all inspirational but rather intended to provoke discussion. The site quoted offers a way to browse the sayings.

In a similar vein...
The Starbucks project reminded me of This I Believe, which is an international project engaging people in writing, sharing, and discussing the core values that guide their daily lives. These very inspirational essays are often featured on NPR.

Whether you have a minute or an hour, check out these sites for some stimulation.

Judy Warner

Lovey

My mother-in-law, Lovey, returned to Arizona earlier this week after a six-day visit. While she was here we traveled five hours to the east to watch a grand-daughter’s graduation; an hour to the west to visit a grandson in college and some of her friends from work many years ago; and a half-hour into the Finger Lakes area to run some errands for me. In between, we shopped at various times for a matching pair of shoes for her lime green/sky blue pants suit, a new brown jacket for fall, and a maroon sweater that will go with anything. We spent one afternoon at a casino and another visiting a nursing home where she took a pet rabbit around to meet residents, most of whom were younger than her. One evening when we actually stayed home, she danced the tap routine she used to do in vaudeville for us. I was exhausted when she left!

Did I mention Lovey is 90 years old?

I have long been in awe of Lovey. For my daughter’s wedding two years ago, she spent more time on the dance floor than I did. Every time I need to find her in a store, it is never a problem as she always is dressed in bright colored pants suits or dresses – with bag and shoes to match, of course. And, I notice where ever I take her, Lovey always manages to start up a conversation with someone and leave them laughing.

When my father-in-law passed away five years ago, Lovey quickly discovered that staying home alone did not suit her. I would bet she is probably the oldest volunteer at her local high school. Every school day she is in at 6:30 am, assisting at the bookstore and making copies. When she turned 90 last year, the school threw her a wonderful party. Teachers take her out to dinner. Students stop in to say ‘hi’. Everyone wants to be around Lovey.

Lovey reminds me that age is a state of mind. If we are simply who we are and take each day one at a time then it matters not how old we are, how many days we have lived. Each day is precious and if we are blessed to have many of them in our lives, then we are far better off living each day fully rather than dwelling on how many we have already lived.

Enjoy your day and may you have 90 years of joyful living too.

Judy Warner

Little Things

"My most important moments go by, and I don't even know it 'til they're gone."
~ Gretchen Cryer and Nancy Ford

Reading a novel the other day on my front porch, I inadvertently dozed off. My head bounced on my chest and I woke to feel the spring sun warming my face and body. Sweet; and such a little thing.

In the middle of a workshop, I see a participant with such focus, such positive intention, staring up at me that he makes me smile. His energy hits me like a bolt of lightning. A little thing that's with me still.

Looking out my window this morning, I see green leaves where there were bare branches just a few weeks ago. The new season flows like a wave through my waking body. Lovely view; just a little thing, and one I will treasure all summer.

Sipping tea at an outdoor café, watching people and soaking up the sun and sounds of my small city, I know it's this moment that counts. Such a brief moment, such a little thing.

Big things in disguise, these moments beckon and invite us to notice them. And yet, if you're like me, you are mostly in pursuit of the next moment, letting this one get away. As Judy W. so wonderfully put it in our previous post, I'm already on my way to the next moment, the next completed task. Except when I'm asleep, my body is in constant motion following my thinking – where and what I need to be or do next.

There is so much to do. Time flies. And sometimes, as I rush to get it all done, I remember these little moments of now. Why not linger here? What's the rush?

It's impossible, of course. And yet … Take this moment. Go ahead; take it. Could it be a big thing in disguise? In any case, it won't be here long.

I wish you a day filled with little things and present moments.

~ Judy Ringer

Heads Up

These past few weeks I have felt a bit battered by conflict and stress. Too often I have been distracted by thought and missed an exit on our expressway or found myself walking down an aisle in the supermarket wondering how I got there. A few nights ago as I walked down the stairs from my aikido dojo, I realized that my head was bowed and I was oblivious of the people I had passed. I took a deep breath, raised my head, realigned my posture, and experienced an immediate shift in my awareness and added lightness in my steps.

We have a choice every minute of every day. We can choose to be present in the moment or lost in thoughts about the past and anticipation of the future. Those who dwell in the past or future, never are fully there to savor the day, to give themselves fully to others in conversations, or to focus on issues, topics, projects before them. It is an irony that the best way to be ready for tomorrow is to stay present today.

Getting centered helps you to stay present in the moment. If you catch yourself bowed in thought, pause, breathe, raise your head and center. Take in your surroundings, acknowledge those present, and then address the issues at hand. If you feel yourself drifting back into thought, get up and move about a bit if you are seated. If you are walking, change your pace. Do something that brings you back to the moment.

Breathing in, I center Breathing out, I let go of cares Breathing in, I acknowledge my vision Breathing out, I connect with my surroundings

Judy Warner

Wired to Worry

My friend, Janice, on our morning walk around the neighborhood: "How're you doing?" Me: "Good, except I seem to be in worry mode overtime these days." Janice: "Me, too."And we started to talk about how, when, and why we worry so much, and what we worry about.

I realized a long time ago that I am "wired to worry." Fifteen years ago, when I was changing careers, I took some time for myself to rest, sort things out, and explore other career paths. I noticed during this time of R&R just how much I could find to worry about, even though there wasn't anything to worry about. This was how I discovered my need to worry. I'd catch myself perseverating (great word, isn't it?) over the smallest, silliest stuff. It didn't matter that life was easy at the moment. I would find things to fret about. I was good at it.

Janice said she could identify totally with this need to find things for the mind to latch onto. She's the one who postulated that maybe certain humans are "wired to worry." I love this idea (that maybe I'm wired that way), because it helps me put all my worry into perspective, even the thoughts that seem to warrant worry. Is this just me needing to worry about something, I ask myself?

Does anything warrant anxiety? Does worry help? Probably not. I think I would rather be centered and interested and maybe even fascinated with what is, rather than worried about it. My guess is that I will make better decisions if those decisions are guided by center and not by fear and apprehension.

So I breathe in and honor my worried self, my reactive self, my caring-too-much-and-wanting-to-get-it-right self. You will always be with me, I think. And I am grateful for the caring part and the wanting to get it right part. I see how the worry shows up as an extension of something I appreciate about me.

As I acknowledge and (yes) honor my worry, I can exhale it for now, knowing it will return, and knowing we may eventually become friends. Yes.

Judy Ringer

More on Breathing

I smiled when I read Judy’s post of May 10 on holding your breath. Just days before in an aikido class I had watched a student do a pretty darn good job on a throw. After he finished, I smiled and said, ‘you can breathe now.’ He laughed as he exhaled. It was true – he had held his breath throughout the entire throw. And, as he moved through the throw, the smoothness of his moves slipped away. Tension increased the longer he held his breath and it reflected in his execution of the technique.

Twenty-two years ago, as a beginning aikido student, I visited George Leonard’s dojo in Northern California. Richard Heckler was teaching a class. As we warmed up by rolling around the mat, Richard walked over to me and told me that I was holding my breath. He was right. And, I was totally unconscious of it. I learned a great lesson that day and ever since I am careful to watch my own students and point out when they are holding their breath.

So, I wonder if you have tried Judy’s suggestion to notice how often you are holding your breath? It is a good one. One thing I notice is that if I resolve an issue, I am aware of how much easier I am breathing. A good next step for me would be to begin to notice in the midst of the conflict what my breathing is like. Awareness is the first step for changing a pattern.

Hope you all have a good weekend.

Judy Warner

The Bracelet

The other day my daughter Jaye gave me a bracelet. She told me that she was ‘passing it down’ to me. It is a simple silver bracelet with a small span of silver engraved with the word ‘Boston”.

About a year ago, Jaye decided she wanted to try and qualify for the Boston Marathon. Qualifying for Boston for most runners is a significant undertaking. Just training for a marathon means logging in many miles of running a week. It requires considerable discipline. To qualify for Boston, the pressure of finishing a marathon in an age and sex specific time gets added to the ‘simple’ feat of running 26.2 miles.

Jaye had the ‘Boston’ bracelet made and wore it every day to remind her of her goal. When she thought she was too busy to run, she would look at the bracelet and go for a run. When the weather was cold and rainy, she would look at the bracelet and go for a run. When she doubted her abilities, she would look at the bracelet and go for a run. About five months later, Jaye ran the Portland Marathon and qualified for Boston. A few weeks ago, she ran the actual Boston Marathon and savored every minute of it.

Now, she is encouraging me to follow in her footsteps. This morning I was a bit jet lagged. The laundry was piled high, my in-box piled even higher, but I looked at the bracelet and went out for a run.

We all have many demands upon our time that make it easy to lose sight of a goal. What goal are you working on? What can be your ‘bracelet’ to help you stay focused on your goal?

Judy Warner

Are you breathing?

Sometimes I need to check. Holding the breath is such a patterned response to stress or pressure that I don't always notice I'm doing it. As I took in Judy Warner's previous post, I got quieter inside. Alternatively, when I am in a hectic environment or with another person who's uncentered or tense, I kind of "catch" their tension. Have you noticed this yourself?

You can become a more centered person by becoming more aware of your breathing. For example, one practice you can try right now is to notice how many times you hold your breath in the next hour. Extend it for a longer period if you like, but an hour is long enough. As soon as you catch yourself, you can breathe again. You'll be surprised how often you stop.

Another related practice is to begin to notice where tension lodges in your body and then let it go. Check it out right now. How is your forehead, your jaw, your tongue, your eyelids? Not to mention shoulders, lower back, and joints. At first you may think you're relaxed. As you connect more deeply with these different areas, notice if there are subtler levels of tension you can let go of? Usually there are.

This tension affects how we experience the world and how flexible we can be in managing what the world sends our way. Send energy into these areas and allow it to transform the tension into connection -- with yourself and your environment.

Breathe now, breathe often. Notice tension and let it go. Sit quietly. Be. Just be.

Judy Ringer

Quiet Moments

All man's miseries derive
from not being able
to sit quietly in a room alone.
Pascal

There is an old Zen phrase: "If you understand, things are just the way they are. If you do not understand, things are just the way they are." So to be centered is to experience things the way they are and to not fear perceptions. Center builds confidence in your connection to all of life, and an acceptance of what life brings.

Living from center on a daily basis is certainly enhanced by the discipline of meditation. Becoming quiet in a busy world is something we would all love to do. One of the difficulties that many people have in considering meditation is that they think it is one more thing that they have to do in their life. Instead, look upon meditation as a time to spend each and every day in the place inside yourself in which there is deep security and peace. If you do so, this place inside yourself will be more available to you in times of stress. You will also convey this sense of deep security and peace more often in your interactions with your family and colleagues.

Remember that setting the clock a little earlier and taking time for meditation before you begin your day will send you off more rested than the extra sleep.

Question of the Day....What qualities do you wish to exude in your relationships? Name them out loud, write them down. Visualize what you look like when you show forth these qualities, what words do you say? Understand that you possess these qualities now and project them when you are centered. The next time you would like to act in a way that reflects these qualities, take a deep breath and center yourself before you speak or act.

Judy Warner

Taken from one of our original monthly Centering Hints. To subscribe to Tom Crum's Centering Hints, send an email to info@aikiworks.com with 'subscribe' in the subject line.

Being the Mountain

As I hiked up the path to the Peaceful Valley Chapel, I relished the quiet of my early morning solitude. After many years, the ten-minute hike has become a personal ritual. Each morning of each Journey to Center week, before our breathing and meditation at 7, I go to the top of this small mountain to be inspired by the view of a much higher mountain range in the distance.

I stare at the 14,000-foot peaks, open my arms and breathe, inviting their energy, power, beauty and peace into my being. I contrast their stability and their "just there-ness" with my own approval-seeking energy, their effortless poise with my striving to do the right thing, and their natural and graceful essence with my desire to appear knowledgeable and beautiful and centered.

Could I possibly just BE? Like the mountain?

This thought has turned into a practice. Each time (well, most times) that I find myself in striving or approval-seeking mode, I stop, breathe, and think about the mountain.

Each time I practice, I feel my body come back to a relaxed stance, mind clear, my being at rest. It is as if I have been leaning forward - out of myself - looking for something, someone, to be okay. As I think of the mountain, I come back to center.

Is there a place that helps you return to your own powerful presence, where your needs are met and you're fine just the way you are. Find it now–in your office, your home, your cubicle. Bring your mountain back into view. And have a great journey to center.

Tom Crum is holding his next Journey to Center this September 8-12, in Lyons, Colorado. Consider joining us and finding the mountain within. Good ki!

Judy Ringer