Positively Philadelphia

I haven't been to Paris, but I did spend part of last week in Philadelphia attending the First World Congress of Positive Psychology, where I enjoyed four days of learning, dining al fresco, and taking in as much as I could of what this great city has to offer (which is a lot!). And yes, I climbed all those stairs at the Philadelphia Museum of Art - the ones Rocky climbs, waving his arms in exultation after he's finally in shape enough to take them all at a run (I did it the first time; there aren't that many).

I imagine every tourist wants to reenact that scene. I sure did. But what I didn't know from watching the movie is that there's an incredible view from atop those stairs - a long boulevard of beautiful trees, international flags, parks, fountains and people culminating in a national monument (City Hall) and a breathtakingly beautiful skyline. I felt like I was on top of the world.

The trip was already worthwhile, and then there was the Congress itself, which offered background, statistics, and solid research proving things we already know are true: that happy people are healthier, live longer, and have closer, more lasting relationships.

My personal favorite was David Cooperrider, the founder of Appreciative Inquiry, who gave a most hopeful presentation on AI, organizational development, and "Business as an Agent of World Benefit." I also appreciated hearing Mihaly Csikszentmihaly (author of Flow) talk about the evolution of human thought. His premise is that our decision to choose happiness, individually and as a species, will make a huge difference in the future we are creating each day, each moment.

As Judy W. offered from Paris, "... it is always our choice to deal with unexpected circumstances pleasantly or spend our time complaining about what might have been." Not only is this true, but Judy's choice in Paris (besides making her happier) makes the whole planet a better place to live, and helps move us toward a happier future. And now we have research to prove it!

Good ki,

Judy R.

Lessons from Paris

Sitting here on the other side of the Atlantic Ocean this morning. ..a peaceful Sunday morning in Paris. My travel schedule for May/June has severely curtailed my blogging. Much thanks to Ellen and Judy for filling in.

I am always fascinated when I travel with the opportunities to step back and reassess my own behaviors. This trip to Paris is no exception.

Yesterday my husband and I stopped for lunch at an outdoor restaurant set in a huge park called Tuileries near the Louvre. No sooner had we been seated at a table under a huge free-standing canvas awning that provided shade when clouds started to roll in. The wait staff immediately began picking up outlying tables, not protected by canvas umbrellas and awnings and sandwiching them in among other tables wherever they could fit. As rain started falling, diners picked up their wine and baguettes and cheerfully headed for any vacant covered seats. There was a good deal of laughing and gesturing among the multi-lingual crowd in the ensuring chaos. Eventually, everyone settled down again to enjoy their meals.

What struck me was the cheerfulness of the entire process. Everyone made a choice to make the best of a very wet situation and still enjoy their afternoon. I have often been in situations where weather has intervened and the tenor of a group has shifted to complaining. This scenario of turning lemons into lemonade seems to be a theme of this trip. The previous day at the world renowned Paris Air Show, I watched at thousands of Parisians cheerfully plopped themselves down on asphalt walk and road ways to watch the sky when grandstand seats were all taken.

I am sure that there are many instances in this crowded city where conflict is not greeted as an opportunity to relax and flow with circumstances. But, I wonder if Paris is not offering me a gift of a lesson well known but perhaps not always practiced that I can take home with me and apply in my own life – it is always our choice to deal with unexpected circumstances pleasantly or spend our time complaining about what might have been.

Au revoir - time to go out for a latte and accept my next teaching from this trip!

Judy Warner -

Follow Judy on her twitter account, aikijudy, for reminders to stretch and center!

Live and Laugh At It All

One of my Aunt Mimi's favorite songs was "Life is Just a Bowl of Cherries."

Life is just a bowl of cherries,
Don't take it serious, life's too mysterious.
You work, you slave you worry so,
But you can't take your dough when you go, go, go,
So, keep repeating, "It's the berries."
The strongest oak must fall.
The sweet things in life to you were just loaned,
So how can you lose what you never owned.
Life is just a bowl of cherries,
So live and laugh at it all.


If you don't have your own recording, you can listen and download my rendition here.

I hope that brightened your day. And, you can do it yourself. I've been practicing the spirit of this song lately, noticing my moods, and experimenting with choosing happiness, choosing the reality I want to live in, or as I say in my writing, "inventing your life" one moment at a time. Some days it comes easy, some days I have to practice more. Try some of these today, even if you're already happy!

• Look up at the sky.
• Listen to your favorite song.
• Sing your favorite song.
• Take a walk.
• Go to the ocean, lake or your favorite place for regaining perspective.
• Take yourself out for a cup of tea.
• Talk with a happy friend.
• Notice one thing you're grateful for today.

Next weekend, I'll be attending the first Institute for Positive Psychology Congress in Philadelphia, PA. I'm sure I'll come back with more ideas about inventing life, one ki moment at a time. Stay tuned!

For now, you can find 21 stories and songs about presence, gratitude, perspective, and choosing the "Good Reality" on my new CD, Simple Gifts: Making the Most of Life's Ki Moments. You can purchase it or just listen to two tracks for free at www.JudyRinger.com.

Good ki!
Judy Ringer

Time is My Friend - More Thoughts on Time Management

In an April Journey to Center posting, I wrote about the quirkiness of time, and included the following aphorism:

TIME IS MY FRIEND

TIME IS MY ALLY

I HAVE ALL THE TIME I NEED FOR EVERYTHING I WANT TO DO.

Since then, I've had oher occasions to revisit just how complicated it can be to balance time requests these days and more practice with staying centered in chaos.

One of my students wrote that she is "just too busy to attend to personal needs vs. work, work, work" and is looking for a way to take care of herself while meeting the requirements of her workplace. In my own life, it usually isn't about eliminating things I don't want to do. I want to do it all, because it's all fun, great stuff. But–it seems–I cannot.

Here are a couple of thoughts that have helped me and my students in our quest for managing all the great things there are to do in life.

• First, don't judge yourself about where you're spending your time. Wherever you are, be there 100 percent. If you're working, try to notice why you said yes to the work and enjoy that part of it. Be present to the moment.

• Second, use your calendar or daytimer as a tool to give you what you want. Mark it with work and personal time, and attend to it. For example, I'm re-writing my first CD, Managing Conflict in the Workplace: An Aiki Approach, and it's very easy for me to let that creative time slip into something else, like answering email or returning phone calls. I'm getting better at blocking out the time in advance and sticking with what I said I was going to do with it.

• Take a moment now to breathe in . . . and breathe out . . . This is a ki moment. Expand your energy. Center and regain perspective. Check in with yourself. You can do this anytime.

The Aiki Gals would love to hear how you manage to center, stay present, and appreciate each moment. Write us!

Good Ki,
Judy Ringer

PS: Learn more about Ki Moments on my new CD, Simple Gifts.

Waiting for ....

First, a very big smile and thank you to my aiki gal pal, Ellen, for liking my new CD, Simple Gifts, and for reminding me why I created it. I need to listen to it again myself - again and again. It's so easy to fall into forgetfulness. I get overwhelmed by all there is to do and forget the beauty of the day, the sun, the moment. I catch a bit of daily news and lose my center to it. Forgetting to be grateful for what is here and now, I find myself in the subtle, almost invisible place of waiting for a time when my life will be perfect.

My husband Jim and I went to NYC this past weekend and saw Waiting for Godot off Broadway, with Nathan Lane and Bill Irwin. Gogo (Lane) asks over and over again during the course of the play, "What are we doing here?"
Didi (Irwin) answers, "Waiting."
Gogo: "Waiting for what?"
Didi: "Waiting for Godot."
Gogo: "Oh."

And so they go on, trying to pass the time until Godot appears. He never does.

We are left asking, who/what is Godot? And what does Godot represent? Happiness? Meaning? God? Death? What am I doing here? Waiting for? Who is Godot for me? This subtle sense of waiting for something to happen, the sense of the next moment being the important one, is ever present. Seeing the play again raised my awareness of waiting as a preoccupation.

What are we waiting for? ... when here and now is all we have.

The antidote - it seems to me anyway - is to notice the waiting and stop. This is it. Right now.

What are we waiting for? ... when here and now is all we have.

Would love to hear your thoughts on this.

Good ki!

Judy Ringer